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Vague Wisdom
Adventures in Gimp-dom
At this point it's difficult to tell whether I'm getting better or worse. I think on the whole things are improving, but never long enough to be sure. Tapering off of prednisone, I called the on-call doctor yesterday to talk some things through. I'll start using my nebulizer more frequently. Somehow I had the impression it was a bad idea to use the albuterol (for the nebulizer) with prednisone. She assures me I'm mistaken. So I'm using it about every four hours on a schedule. My breathing isn't as deep as I'd like, but it's a fairly easy breath. My breathing is a bit noisier than I would prefer. :-) People should feel free to ignore these emails. I think better out loud and since I use voice recognition some of this writing is me thinking out loud.

I should let folks know that I was off-line most of yesterday because of a technical glitch that has been resolved. Being sick with no Internet is not my idea of a good time! I hope everyone else is having a much better New Year. Thanks to all who are thinking about me. I know that I am not the best blogger/correspondent. I tend to "go silent" when I'm not feeling well. These posts are also an attempt at correcting that tendency.

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With a lot of three steps forward, two steps back, I seem to be improving. Doctor put me on prednisone for my wheezing and it seems to help. Talked to the doctor about my use of Xanax for panic attacks and she seemed to think I was using them well and as intended. I went without Xanax at all yesterday, but found myself using one about an hour ago. It's hard to tell if the breathing is getting better today or not. I am able to breathe pretty well, but still wheezing more than I'd like. Actually went out for dinner yesterday. So, I'm still kicking. I hope everyone else is doing well.

Current Location: My study
Current Mood: anxious anxious

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I often write in this thing when I feel depressed or anxious. Please feel free to skip this post if you have had your fill of self-indulgent whining. I've been in relatively good health this year, but just got a cold a few days ago. So far it's been pretty mild and I hope I'm on the getting better side of it all. The cold isn't that bad, but it really brings back my panic attacks. I cough up anything and my head is telling me I'm going to choke. I'm going to die. Now I'm pretty sure that I'm overreacting, but it still feels real. I do have Xanax, which helps me get to sleep. I guess I just want to tell someone that I am worried. Don't anyone feel they need to do anything about this. Often just saying things out loud or writing them in public helps to get them in perspective. I hate being so afraid.

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Current Mood: scared scared

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I voted for Nader. I'm a Green and I will vote for Hillary Clinton​.

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I have the same diagnosis as the man who wrote this opinion piece. It gets close to how I feel on the subject.

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I'm back from the hospital!

What? You want details?Collapse )

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Current Location: My study
Current Mood: anxious anxious
Current Music: SG-U on Hulu

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From [personal profile] serene via [profile] sundaystealing.

When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?

If were talking personal letters to people we know I would probably have to go back to summer camp when I was 10 or 11. I have written to my representatives on various issues. I'm not sure when I wrote the last one (maybe six months ago?)

Can you change the oil on a car?
Physically able to? No. Know how to? Well, no I don't know how to either.

Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Never driven, so no speeding tickets.

Run out of gas?
[personal profile] loracs, and I broke a fuel line in LA once. So I guess you could say that was running out of gas.

Favorite kind of sandwich?
I am my mother's son and I love sandwiches. All kinds. If I like the ingredients at all putting them between two slices of bread is a plus. I have a special fondness for a sandwich [personal profile] loracs designed for me at Genova's Deli (that doesn't exist anymore at least as a sandwich place.) It was their Italian meat with fresh mozzarella on sliced sourdough with oil and vinegar. I love grilled cheese, hamburgers, liverwurst and PB&J cooked or uncooked. I loves me some sandwiches!

What is your usual bedtime?
2 or 3 AM.

Are you lazy?
More often than not.

When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
I hate to write it but the costume I wore the most was "hobo". Mostly, because it was easy to put together.

Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
I don't think so, wait I just started paying for an alumni membership to UC Berkeley. I think it comes with a magazine.

Which are better, legos or lincoln logs?
I reject the concept of better in this question. I like Legos a little more because they are more versatile to me, but both are fine time-killers. Not that I can use them anymore.

Are you stubborn?
I happen to think stubbornness gets a bad rap. I believe that I can be stubborn, but don't have to be. I also think that my stubbornness has kept me alive on more than one occasion.

Who is better, Leno or Letterman?
I hate the way Letterman handles some topics; being fat for example. I've always thought that Letterman was careful who he made the butt of his comedy. He attacked professionals, people in the public eye in general.

I never found Leno particularly funny. He's also very unimaginative. What I truly detest is how Leno picked on ordinary people who could not defend themselves. All of his "man on the street" interviews made fun of people who didn't deserve it. I always felt that Letterman did his best to take care of the people on his show.

Ever watch soap operas?
Sure, I watched Dark Shadows when I was a kid. I also watched my mother's soap operas: General Hospital and One Life to Live. I sometimes watch [personal profile] loracs's soaps with her but not very often.

Afraid of heights?
I'm afraid of hurting myself. Heights tend to make me think of falling, but I can usually deal with heights if I need to.

Sing in the car?
Sure, but then I sing everywhere. I'm not particularly good and I don't always know all the words, but I sing it's a family thing.

Dance in the shower?
No, showers are for getting clean and having sex.

Dance in the car?
About as much as I dance anywhere.

Ever used a gun?
Nope, unless you count a BB gun.

Do you think musicals are cheesy?
What's wrong with cheesy? Sure some are, but I tend to like them much more that I dislike them. I'm enjoying the soundtrack to Hamilton. Love Les Miserables, Rocky Horror, Little Shop of Horrors (*not* the movie). I love Sondheim. Hate Andrew Lloyd Webber (except for Jesus Christ Superstar)

Is Christmas stressful?
Nah.

Ever eat a pierogi?
Sure, they are like little sandwiches.

Major annoyance right now?
Well, besides the world at large. Right now I’m terribly bothered by a DVD digitizing service called Vudu. For a fee they allow you to take DVDs that you already own and store them online. Because of licenses a great deal of my DVDs are not eligible for transfer. I’m annoyed that those same DVD’s can be purchased and added to my online library for a significantly higher price than the transfer fee. “Grrrrr”

Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Astronaut, Pilot, Actor, Rock guitarist.

Do you believe in ghosts?
No.

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I'm listening to The Weepies (a fairly new favorite band for me) playing in a coffee shop in Iowa city over the Internet broadcast by Iowa Public Radio News. I'm reading a New York Times article about a child with cancer and his family. (Trigger warning: it is fairly descriptive of a child going through a very rough time.) The ending is a happy one, but what strikes me from the article is how little we know about anything in this world. I find this comforting, because it means there is so much more to learn and understand in this crazy world.

This is a great day for me.

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My sweetie, Serene's Dad's TeachElectronics.com site is offering a giveaway of a free Arduino (or Genuino if you're outside the US), partly for fun, and partly to test their new commenting system. If you want to enter, please head over there, and signal-boosting would be greatly appreciated.

http://teachelectronics.com/arduino-resources-and-a-giveaway/

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Current Mood: okay okay

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I haven't been feeling too well the last few days. Had a bit of a sore throat and no real energy. Ask [personal profile] loracs how long it took me to get out of the car when we went to Zachary's. Got home happy about the food but really tired. Felt so bad today, I cancelled my therapy appointment. Even though my therapist is very good about letting me do my appointments over the phone. All I can think of was going back to bed. Then I started feeling a little flushed and my teeth started chattering. Turns out I had a temperature. After a while I determined that I had cellulitis again *grrr*. At least I know why I felt like crap lately. I now on antibiotics and ibuprofen for the fever. Hopefully I'll feel improved by tomorrow. I feel so fragile these days (not my favorite self-image.) :-(

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Current Mood: aggravated aggravated

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